Doesn’t feel like Summer


As usual, I took and unreasonably long break from this blog. I came back because I have actually entered the worst state of my life so far. I look at my old posts and see how depressed I was about the smallest things. Those issues literally do not match up to what I’m experiencing now.

I don’t feel like a kid. I don’t feel okay. I’m just not happy. Recently, a lot of stuff has been going down with my sister and her life. I don’t want to get into it in order to respect her privacy (as if anyone reads this), but it involves her husband and her mentality in general. For a long time, she has been keeping secrets from my whole family, which is totally okay. However, it has to reach a limit. She’s been keeping way many secrets, and I’m starting to learn about them one by one.

You know what, I might as well just tell you guys what went down to make it easier to explain.

My family, including my sisters husband, were planning a trip to Mexico during spring break since December. However, my sister came to stay with us away from her house because of a little argument with her husband for a couple of weeks. It was scary, but we all thought things would repair itself when we got to Mexico, and they would work things out.

It didn’t.

Halfway through our trip, they had a huge fight. To sum up the main points, her husband was about to leave Mexico, but changed his mind. Then, my sister told us the following day (which was our last night there) that she was going to leave and take a flight to Tennessee. At that point, she screwed up. Their relationship was pretty much crushed from there.

After that, she came back to our house to stay until she found her own place. Some disagreements arose between her and my dad because she was going to bars every night and he was worried about what she was doing, so she left to stay with a friend. She’s most likely never coming back, and is planning on moving to another state by the summer.

And that brings us to now, where I’m actually struggling to keep pushing forward. I have so many issues, and I never expected for this to happen. I really hope that things get better. My sister thinks everyone is against her, but she needs to understand that she doesn’t know what she’s doing, and we just care about her.

I hate that I’m not trusted to learn what’s going on with her, I need to understand. She caused too much damage, and I deserve to know why.

There’s other things that are bothering me, but I don’t think I should talk about them now.

Thanks to everyone who reads this. I just really needed to let it out.


4 thoughts on “Doesn’t feel like Summer

  1. john says:

    Sometimes just doing something with someone, or just sitting together without saying anything at all, is helpful. Is there anything you could do to relieve some of the anxiety and stress of other family members? It would occupy your mind and take something off of their to-do list. Also, ask your mom questions about the family you don’t know, yet. Let her do some talking about them…reminiscing or perhaps looking at pictures with her. She would be pleased you are interested in her family. Try to avoid taking on concerns and cares that you can’t do anything about. Each person has enough issues to deal with. Hope it all works out for you.

    Liked by 1 person

    • ali says:

      Yeah, I really shouldn’t have been stressed about it in the first place. I really can’t do anything about it. I’m going to try getting back into drawing, maybe that will help. Thanks for the advice 🙂


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