Summer vacation has just started for me, and I was ready for everything to start getting better. I’m happy school is out of the way for a little while, and I have more time to feel like myself again. However, I’ve noticed that I have been getting worse (mentally) in just a couple of days. I’m usually pretty relaxed, and I don’t get irritated easily unless something gets really out of hand. But it’s like I have entered this different dimension where everything is just getting on my nerves recently. Every day, there’s at least one moment where I lose my temper for a second, and I don’t know why. It’s summer, so I should be way more relaxed. Instead, it’s like something is forcing me to get angry.
For example, I tripped a little and I hit my phone against a table, I started getting angry over my camera, and worrying if it was damaged. Then, I started to get angry out of embarrassment because I thought my sister was FaceTiming someone and heard me. You see, the littlest of things are getting me all of a sudden, and I don’t get why.
I thought it could have been the heat since it’s been really hot recently, but I manage to get angry next to a running air conditioner as well. Whenever I’m angry, I’m always confused on how my anger built up so quickly, and it upsets me. I’ve just stressed my mind out and wasting my energy when I know it’s for nothing.I’m going to start controlling myself and find ways to relax. I don’t want to start a cycle of me losing my temper all summer.
Thanks for reading.
Painting found here: https://www.deviantart.com/louisdyer/art/Unfiltered-Anger-345244833